Sparks of Genius

De-Stress & Deflate Anger: Good For Your Heart May 30, 2007

“I don’t know what’s happening with my life.” Who hasn’t felt that way? Life moves at breakneck speed and that can lead to stress, anger and heart attacks. Is there a way out without $150 per hour therapy and $25 per pill medications? Here are some free techniques to help you de-stress and feel good at any age.

A client was having trouble getting her son to his appointment.

“My mother broke her arm and is living with me. I don’t know what’s happening with my life.” Those of us in the sandwich generation get pushed at both ends, and we have our own issues. “I need my reading glasses, but I can’t remember where I put them.” We’re having increased responsibilities to others while at the same time our physical and mental abilities are declining.

Now it doesn’t have to be as bad as it sounds. Life does not have to be a xanax moment. Some things are inherently on our side and there is more we can do to stack the deck.

The Benefits of Age

Aging is more than high cholesterol and cellulite. We can also gain wisdom and calmness from life experience. Instead of breaking all my crystal when I am angry, I can just imagine smashing it and avoid the cleanup. If I am really desperate, I can throw some ice. I can recognize my feelings and think about how to use them productively. My mind tells me the consequences of my actions because I have been at this juncture before.

When I was younger I was tossed about by my emotions. Now I have my lifelines. I remember the ring of Solomon which states, “This too will pass.” I ask myself if this will really matter in 1000 years. I go for a walk, call a friend or ask the audience. I have an arsenal of techniques keep me sane. This doesn’t mean that I’m always in control. When I get to be an enlightened being I’ll let you know. But things that would have set me off in the past have lost of their potency and I have gained some of mine.

Better Living through Technology

At Sparks of Genius we use some technological innovation to help with stress.

HeartMath® technology teaches you how to shift from a negative emotion to a positive one. When you do this, your heart rhythms automatically shift to a state of coherence, releasing a cascade of positive neural, hormonal and biochemical events.

When they are using the Harmony Sparking Station in our electronic playground, HeartMath® computer, we teach our clients learn the Quick Coherence Technique, so that they can see the changes in their heart rhythms in real time. If you want to get ahead of the game, you can practice this technique on your own.

Step 1 – Heart Focus

Focus your attention on the area around your heart.

Step 2 – Heart Breathing

Pretend you are breathing through your heart area. Breathe slowly to a count of 5 or 6.

Step 3 – Heart Feeling

Continue to breathe through your heart and find a positive feeling. You could remember an appreciation for someone, a fun activity or a time in your life when you felt at peace. Think about one of the many things that you could be grateful for. Once you have found the positive feeling, sustain it with heart focus, heart breathing and heart feeling.

Do this exercise several times a day. Make it part of yourself. You can even make it a point to practice when you are stopped for a red light. Then it can become a life line.

As soon as you feel angry, practice heart focus, heart breathing and heart feeling. Once you have those positive feelings flowing, ask yourself how you could best handle your situation. Do you need a time out or is there something that you could do or say that will help. Do you need to journal, jog or schedule an appointment with your life coach?

Remember that if we are lucky enough to stay around on this planet, we will all grow older. The gift is being able to grow wiser.

By Ninah Kessler, LCSW
Life Coach